Never Give Up! —except…
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11
When I first began thinking about a career, I decided I wanted to be a veterinarian. I loved our dogs, cats, and horses were my most favorite animal. So…like lots of other animal lovers, I thought a vet would be the life for me.
But, like many of us as we finalize our career choice, I changed my mind. I had awesome teachers throughout my public school years and again in college. That led me to the vocation of teaching. I’ve never regretted that career path and recently retired after forty years of teaching, both in public schools and at the university level.
It’s important to have goals in our lives–something to work toward and achieve. It’s also acceptable to change those goals as our interests or family obligations change (marriage, children, health issues, etc.)
But…what happens when we can’t achieve the goals we’ve set?
Retirement has been a challenging adjustment for me. I developed a long list of goals to accomplish and, foolishly, I thought it would be easy to do all. After all, I typically worked fifty to sixty hours a week at my job so I’d have SO MUCH TIME in retirement!
HA! I expect every retired person is saying, “Oh, you idiot! Don’t you know that in retirement you are busier than ever?”
Yes, I’d heard people say that, but I didn’t believe it. I’m a planner. I’m good at organizing. How difficult can it be to get my house cleaned and organized? It will be simple to set aside specific times for writing. I’ll have a schedule for working with our horses. In my spare time I’ll volunteer in the schools and visit in nursing homes. Yard work and gardening are only in spring, summer, and fall, so the winter months will give me more time for writing.
Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. Proverbs 16:3
I thought I had everything planned out. Sure, I’d prayed about retirement–that God would guide me in my plans.
Ah…you see? That’s my problem–it’s been my plan, not God’s.
I’m so busy, I hardly have time to breathe and have accomplished very little in regard to the goals I set. Church and family obligations consume a large amount of my time. I’ve taken on some part time work to help meet financial needs. My writing opportunities are so limited and far between that I’ve only been able to complete smaller projects (my book has been on the back burner for months).
My motto of “Never Give Up!” impels me to keep trying to…
Get It All Done!
But…my common sense tells me to, slow down, and set some realistic goals–and…
Let go of some stuff…
What?
I’ve worked more than forty years to reach this stage of my life–a time when I can choose what I want to do and accomplish goals that are important for me.
But, my plan isn’t working.
How do I make myself recognize that I can’t do as much as I want?
How do I give up some of those plans I’ve made and how do I choose which goals to discard?
More importantly, how do I find out what God’s plan is for me at this stage of my life? I’m blessed with a loving family. I’ve had a wonderful and rewarding career.
But, in retirement, I’m struggling to find my purpose. I’m overwhelmed with the number of projects and tasks I’ve undertaken. Clearly, I haven’t done a good job of seeking God’s plan for my retirement years.
This time I’m not passing out advice. I’m asking for assistance and hoping you will share your thoughts and wisdom to help me and others reading this message.
- How do you establish and maintain regular quiet time with God?
- After praying for guidance in a situation, how do you discern God’s will?
- When participating in numerous activities that are in service to our Lord, how do you prioritize or let go of something if you become overwhelmed?
- Have your ever experienced an environment of such “busyness” that you lost your sense of self? How did you find yourself and God again?
I hope you will share your thoughts in the comment section below. I’m grateful for your assistance and very thankful for your prayers. Wishing you blessings, my friends.
Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:12-13
I may have few answers, as I ask myself many of these same questions Ms. Katherine, but perhaps we’ll find some together my friend. As for my “God time”, I do two things. I make the time (for me, it’s rising at 4:00am or so when no one is here to distract me. I spend an hour or so with God. The second is that I literally “Save my Amen” until I lay my head down and night. I keep my lines of communication with heaven open throughout the day. I stay connected. For me, God’s will is often validated by others or His word in my life. I’m an introvert, so when I become overwhelmed (it happens a lot), I seek “God time” (just me and God for a while and I’m refreshed). God’s blessings in your journey ma’am.
Thank you, Jim. Like you, I’m an introvert, so it is a challenge for me to open up about my doubts. You’ve been such a blessing to me in sharing your wisdom, insights, and encouragement. I love your habit of staying connected with God throughout the day. While I find myself speaking to God in conversation during the day, I’m going to make a more conscious effort to do so more frequently–to “keep those lines of communication open”! Springtime, with its glorious display of God’s splendor, is a wonderful time to foster that ongoing connection with God. Thank you, my friend.
I recently came off a season of leadership and I thought that when I didn’t have that I would have all kinds of time. Not so. What I have done is 1. Use a paper calendar. I put a big highlight box around time I want to protect as writing time. Visually this reminds me that I have made a commitment to myself and the Lord. 2. I took everything off my schedule for a year. Did not volunteer. Nothing. I spent that time spiritually regrouping and taking care of things in my life I had been putting off. 3 when I re-entered, it was a deliberate choice to respond to invitations to join God at work. If there was not a compelling reason not to say yes, then I did. But I didn’t go looking for things to do. God brought them. And then I would be a woman if one thing while that was going on. I don’t take on other commitments 4. I make sure I protect time to take of myself and do the things I love to do with the people I love to do them with.
What a blessing you’ve given me today, Denise! Your suggestions are so helpful. Like you, I find a paper calendar useful, but I haven’t been successful in maintaining that dedicated writing time. I know it will only come in conjunction with “clearing my calendar” of some of those ongoing projects and tasks and then NOT loading myself up again. I’m so grateful you took time to respond. It’s comforting to know there are others that lived through a season of “overwhelment” and survived it with renewed faith and energy. Thank you for your inspiration and encouragement.
Oh, Katherine, I’m right there with you. If you read my blog you’ll see I struggle too. I write devotions so the my time at the feet of Jesus is so important. I find my way there often wishing to glean from Him every bit of goodness I can hold. It puts my focus where it should be and makes the rest of life’s goals and tasks fall into their rightful place. Start there and see if it works that way for you.
Such wonderful advice, Patty. Yes, I need to focus on Jesus rather than all the “tasks” that I’ve taken on in an attempt to serve Him. I did read your blog and received a wonderful blessing. When I wrote my blog, I prayed for help and guidance from my faithful Christian readers. Your message was an answered prayer. Thank you!
Katherine, I’ve planned to write a post on this topic, but when I read yours, I felt like you’d been reading my mind. I, too, thought retirement would bring plenty of hours for relaxing and serving God and family. Whether we’re working or retired, time is always short and prioritizing is critical. (Body maintenance takes lots of time as we age!) I want to do what God wants me to do. I appreciate some of the ideas in the comments and will try them. I’m reading Emily Freeman’s book “The Next Right Thing,” and it’s helping me. Thank you so sharing these thoughts and starting the conversation.
Oh, Jeannie–you point out something that I know is true, but find hard to accept. Even though I still have high energy levels and can put in a full day’s work, I’m definitely getting older and can’t accomplish as much as I used to (sigh…). But your next statement is really profound, “I want to do what God wants me to do.” Now that gets right to the heart of my struggle–Am I doing what God wants me to do or am I still try to go solo? Thanks for giving it to me straight, Jeannie. I needed that. I’m grateful to you for sharing insights that have helped you on your journey. Wishing you blessings and praying for you as you cope with some of these same issues.
I think many of us can relate to your circumstances, Katherine. I have been a stay-at-home- mom for a long time, but now my children are in college. My day is open most of the time, but it can fill quickly.
For me, it’s about peace. If I have peace in a situation I am praying about I tend to feel God is saying, “Stay where you are.” or “Keep doing what you are doing.” When I feel overwhelmed God will usually tell me “Something’s got to go.” Then I ask, “Which thing?”
When I write I try to make sure I am spending time with God. I admit to letting things distract me from being in God’s presence, but for me, it helps to get up earlier to make it a priority.
I know God loves you and me and thankfully he knows our hearts.
Peace…I’m still working on that, Stephanie. Before He left them, Jesus told His disciples, “My peace I give to you, My peace I leave with you.” Peace is His gift to us, but we have to accept that gift–it’s like His gift of salvation–we have to give our lives to Jesus and accept that gift. When we do, we are changed. Accepting His gift of peace also changes us. You’ve found the path to peace, Stephanie, and I’m thankful. I’m grateful that you shared this with me to help me on my journey toward peace. Thank you.
Katherine I would like to encourage you with two things. One, we all have influence – use yours wisely. Two, Barnabus means ‘son of encouragement’; we can all have a ministry of encouragement, if we choose it
Thank you, Kari. I have been blessed to receive so much encouragement during this “trial.” I pray that I can be a “daughter of encouragement” for others. Wishing you a blessed Easter!
I fancy myself somewhat of an expert in this after training for a 100-mile race. The key? Get enough rest. Make sure that you are scheduling a full day of Sabbath rest and morning (or whatever works) quiet time. If you shortchange your rest, you shortchange your productivity. Though it seems counterintuitive when you’re looking for “more time,” God operates with a “fish and loaves” type math. More isn’t necessarily more.
The second key is everything has a season. Sometimes we have to cut out good things in order to make room for the best things. What is the number one thing God is calling you to in this season? Prioritize that thing. Fill in your schedule with times of rest. Whatever is left, that’s what “everything else” gets. Prune what needs to be pruned.
Oh, Kelly, what a wonderful and helpful response! You are right, the same discipline that guides training for such an intense goal as a 100 mile race works well for organizing a busy lifestyle, too. Rest (or lack of it) is definitely a factor for “overachievers.” This week, I’ve been implementing some of the strategies my sweet Christian friends have shared with me. Your wise advice to recognize that everything has a season and I need to be willing to select and prioritize is right on target. I’m so grateful that you shared. Wishing you blessings, my friend!